Thursday, August 28, 2008

Overwhelmed

I think there is only one way to describe today... completely overwhelmed in absolutely every way.

When I woke up this morning, I was overwhelmed by the people offering us continued support. I have cried at the house several times, but today I cried because of the outpouring of love. I just can't believe what is being done for us, in this community and beyond.

The list of to-dos is also overwhelming. Thankfully we have so many offers of people who are willing to call businesses on our behalf to find out what we need to do. It is amazing the "strangers" who call up offering to do things for us. I have so many new names written in my notebook. It's just so incredible.

We registered at Bed Bath and Beyond today. I believe it is online. The reality of our loss hit me very hard during that time. I looked up at a wall with at least 50 spatulas on it and couldn't decide what I wanted. All I could think is, "But I liked my spatula better." It was also very hard to put things on to replace what we lost. We just bought a Dyson vacuum a couple of weeks ago. I have allergies, and it really helped to keep the hair and dust up. The guilt though doesn't seem to go away. The manager at Bed Bath and Beyond was amazing and gave us a gift card. We were able to buy pillows, REAL PILLOWS to sleep with. We allowed ourselves to get nice ones as sleep is so critical to us right now. Pillows are also incredibly important to a pregnant woman.

Being pregnant is also very overwhelming right now. There is so much that I need to do, and it involves being on the go all the time. I'm not hungry, but I have to think of what the baby needs and force myself to eat. Alone I could go on little sleep. Pregnant I cannot. I want to sift through the remainders of my past, but the air is so toxic that I really shouldn't.

And speaking of being pregnant, I had a doctor appointment today. I am measuring a little ahead, but everything else looks great. At the end of our appointment, we were taken into a back room where they had planned a baby shower for us. It was absolutely unbelievable. The staff of Treasure Valley Women's Health at St. Als had a table overflowing with gifts. They also had a cake for us. It is amazing how much was put together for us in such a short time... and to think I almost canceled my appointment because I was so tired. We have gone through a few gifts and are just so overwhelmed by the generosity of others.

I know we will continue to feel overwhelmed... not only with the work that is to be done but also with the outpouring from the community. This is an absolutely amazing place, and we are so fortunate to be surrounded and supported by you.

3 comments:

  1. I am so sorry for your loss. Please let me know if you need anything. email me for ANYTHING....
    (BTW I am Marcia Lynch's daughter).
    I live here locally and would willing to do anything I can. Take care and ((((HUGS))))

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  2. Hello, I just found your blog.
    My apartment burned down on April 5 due to some college student's negligence. I was home at the time and managed to save my cat. Everything else was gone.

    It has been a few months and I am still so depressed. Reading your story was interesting to me and I just had to comment. I hope you and your family are doing well.

    Thanks for making this blog. Fire is scary. I am 23. Am I always going to be so afraid?

    -Sar

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  3. First, I am SO sorry for your loss. It is devastating.

    It's really hard to say how long you will be afraid. Counseling REALLY helped me. But even with all the progress I've made, I still am very afraid of fire. If my gas stove gets extra excited, I panic. The sound of fire trucks still stresses me out to the point we've considered getting a police scanner so I know where they are going (hopefully not to my house!). I'm actually going to write more about this.

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